Category Archives: Humor

Laughter is the best medicine, then and now.

There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full ~ Henry A. Kissinger

As I continue to grieve and heal, I look back at those moments during our caregiving journey that brought laughter to our hearts.  Richard had such a dry sense of humor and a quick wit and if truth be told, he really did enjoy having his picture taken too.  We used humor and laughter quite bit during our Caregiving journey.  Whether it was a trip out for a delicious scoop of ice cream or a visit to get a hair cut, we tried to inject as much humor into our day as was humanly possible.

IceCream1  IceCream3










We let our humor combat some of those dark days, too.  Richard loved Monty Python, especially ‘Spamalot’…I think we both saw the play three times.  There was a day, early on after the diagnosis where Richard was playing the music from ‘Spamalot’ when all of a sudden the famous song,


Spamalot (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

“He’s Not Dead Yet” started to blare through the Bose speakers.  We both looked at each other in utter amazement; we laughed, we cried, we hugged each other and we laughed some more.  That song became our battle cry, and because of that song, the laughter we shared, provided that spark which enabled Richard to live his life to the fullest.

As our caregiving journey continued to unfold, there was no doubt that we traveled the journey together, side by side, one by one.  We shared in the emotions, we shared in the joy and laughter,  knowing that sorrow was somewhere around the corner.  Yet the sorrow that we shared was the realization that our time together was not going to be as long as we would have wanted it to be.  No more, no less.

The lesson that I’ve learned during our Caregiving journey was that I was  the co-pilot, Richard was the pilot. Richard was  the one going throughSONY DSC the radiation treatments, Richard was  the one taking the medicine; I was there in a supporting role, simply loving, caring and coping as best we could.  As Caregivers, our journey is filled with difficult peaks and valley’s, we try to pave the roads we journey so that the path is as smooth possible, so when there is a problem at hand,  there is always a gentle breeze at our caree’s back.  Caregiving is filled with so many raw emotions, that sometimes we forget that we are on a beautiful, yet difficult journey together.   For Richard and I, humor and laughter helped lightened some very dark days.  For us then, and for me now, laughter is truly the best medicine.  Laughter allows me to grieve and heal.



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Filed under advocacy, Caregiving, Humor, iHeart Radio, LGBT Caregiving

The Bow-Tie-Guy Tip of the Day:

Life is meant to be lived in forward, not in reverse.

Photo Credit ‘Free Digital Photo’s’

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Filed under advocacy, Advocate, Bow Tie Guy, Humor, Inter-generational Relationships, Live Love Laugh, Love, Older man, Spirituality

The Bow-Tie-Guy Tip of the Day

Always be the rose in your Mother’s eye

Photo Credit: ‘The Purple Jacket’


Filed under Bow Tie Guy, caregiver, Caregiving, Humor, Unconditional Love

The Bow-Tie-Guy Tip of the Day

  Honor your past; but don’t live in it! 

Photo Credit: Free Digital

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‘In These Shoes Part II’

Photo credit: Wikipedia

Today we picked up “The Little One’s”  new shoes today  Hanger Prosthetic and Orthotics.    Unfortunately, the first choice of shoes ‘The Little One’ selected, somehow was not available in a therapeutic model!  These Stilettos would make Bette Midler proud as she would be singing…”In These Shoes” once she laid eyes on these shoes!   

Photo credit: ‘The Purple Jacket’

As we arrived in the office of  Hanger Prosthetic and Orthotics we were greeted by Shelley who assisted us last week with the fitting.  Shelley is great to work with, she pulls no punches, knows what she is talking about and has a care for all her clients.  It was a pleasure to work with her.

Within moments of sitting in the waiting room, the new shoes arrived and the Imelda Marcos of South Florida was back in his element.  Mindful of what Shelley mentioned last week that “these shoes” would feel a little ‘loose’ at first, ‘The Little One’ was quick to comment about just that!  “When I get a blister on the back of my foot from ‘These Shoes’ being loose, I will be back next week to show you!”   Of course, my laughing at this statement was is not the polite thing to do!

Shelley handled the comment with grace; by the time we were ready to leave, the Imelda Marcos of  South Florida had already had is eye out on another pair of shoes.  Should I have really have been surprised?   

The good folks at  Hanger really treated us well today.  There was a complete mix up with the co-pay, they admitted their error and allowed us to send in payment as we were under the impression that there was no funds due upon pick up of ‘These Shoes.’  Customer Service goes a long way in leaving a lasting impression on consumers.  I knew from my previous experience with Hanger that they were a model company whose mission is to help people lead a better life.   They proved it again today!  It goes without saying that when you are in the people business, you need to be about the people!  Hanger proved that again today.  And with that,  had one happy customer leaving their office today!

‘The Purple Jacket’

You see…we might have cancer, but cancer does not have us! 

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Make an Oncologist Smile.

The trip to the oncologist brought a big smile to everyone face. Amazed at the progress of ‘The Little One’ the doctor encouraged us to continue on this smooth path and don’t come back for six months!

Now seven months past the diagnosis and five months past the last Chemo/radiation treatment, we find ourselves on an upwards swing. We have much to be thankful for…

Wonderful family…


Fun times…


Great Friends…


Love comes in all shapes and sizes: don’t let love pass you by because life can change at a moments notice.


You see, we might have cancer… But cancer does not have us!


Filed under Advocate, cancer treatments, Caregiving, Chemotherapy, Esophagus Cancer, Humor, LGBT Couples, Life after Death

Florida arrival

We arrived safe and sound in Deerfield Beach this week. While we miss our family and friends in St. Louis, We are both thankful to be in South Florida.

This afternoon we are visiting the primary care physician; Monday the cardiologist and Tuesday the Oncologist. The report today at the PCP has been great. There is weight gain, all the critical numbers are good. The doctor is quite pleased, and so are we…This has been a remarkable recovery!

It’s great to share our sunshine with you from the Sunshine State!



Filed under advocacy, caregiver, Caregiving, Humor, Intergenerational, Jewish, LGBT, LGBT Couples, Live Love Laugh, Medical Office, Senior Health, Spirituality

‘The Extreme Patient’

While ‘The Little One’ continues to show marked improvement while recovering from the trauma of chemotherapy and radiation, we move on to another calamity called sciatica. Anyone who has had back pain knows how debilitating it can be, yet to alleviate the pain we must be open to new modes of treatment.

On Wednesday we motored to InMotion Health and Wellness for a visit with Dr. Greg Neff to see if Chiropractic help was in order for his current ailment.  The ‘Extreme Patient’ as we see in this photo opportunity for his building fan club,  (yes KJ, the only thing missing is the Tiara!) decided to ride the wave and try out this new treatment.   Of course there was the debate…”This is not going to work”…’Why are we wasting our time”… etc, etc, etc.  While I try not to roll my eyes (at least noticeably  to others), we just continue on with our friendly banter because that is the way we communicate.

Communication is a funny thing; just like relationships.  It’s funny how the two go hand in hand.  Relationships are built on strong communication and trust.    Yet in communicating his apprehension to Chiropractic care, I knew that this was simply a way for him to let off some frustration.    Sometimes, you just have to let go!

As caregivers, we have to be mindful that while we are there in a supporting role, it’s not our body that  is going through the treatments.   How much can the mind and body take in such a short period of time?  I think that really depends on the person and their ability to communicate their wants, needs and desires.  And in the supporting role, the caregiver has to be mindful that what you might want for your loved one, may not be what they want; what a slippery slope!

It is through honest communication,  built on trust and love that truly reveals the essence of a relationship.  We’re glad that we have (and share) this trust and love as we continue on this journey to better health and happiness.



Filed under Acupuncture, Advocate, Caregiving, Health, Humor, Intergenerational, Live Love Laugh, Older man

“Because They Are Nice”

As we continue to recover from the chemo and radiation therapy, we often reflect on ‘how things used to be’.  Always willing to be on the go, ‘The Little One’ has taken a wait and see attitude on many of the things he used to like to do.   While there has been steady progress in his overall health these past few weeks, we are really on a ‘day-to-day event planner schedule.

Crowds has never been his thing, even when feeling good.  So approaching his 81st birthday, I was puzzled at what might we do?  And…if we would be able to do it!  With a small gathering in Brentwood, ‘The Little One” was greeted by ‘The Sisters’ and a couple of friends from our Tuesday night group at Pietro’s.   (of course, one sister forgot to make it)

What struck me about the evening was not so much about the significance of the day, but rather the engagement in conversation of “The Little One.”    I will be the first one to admit that I can be a little worry wort and always have one eye out for him, yet on this night I glad that I did because I saw a person return to life in a way that was good to see.

You see, cancer can take the root out of your being. Cancer drains your energy, it drains your confidence and it drains your piece of mind.  It is easy to understand why so many people give up, that is why outside support is so important in the healing process.  What I saw on Saturday was a man who enjoyed talking about topics that were important to him, all removed from the thought of having cancer.  When the topic turned to the Virgin Islands, well…he was off and running. You can’t go through 81 years of life without having special memories of people, places and things.   It was a joy to watch him revel in the conversation.

When we talked about his ‘engagement’ at the gathering, I mentioned to him that it was great to see him involved in conversation that was important to him and completely outside to scope of health, cancer and the rest.  He too, acknowledged that it was a great experience, with lots of fun  and easy to talk to ‘because they are so nice.’

What “The Little One” learned on this evening is that its good for him to be in conversation on topics that he enjoys as it takes his mind of the health concerns.  What I learned is that I cannot be mother hen, worried about every step in the road.   We live day by day.   Often times we go through life with so many misunderstandings, so many unresolved conflicts and so many worries that seem unbearable.

Yet when you think about it, it is easier to get through the day simply when people are nice!


Filed under Advocate, Bow Tie Guy, cancer treatments, Caregiving, Esophagus Cancer, Health, Humor, Intergenerational, LGBT Couples, SAGE, Spirituality, Uncategorized

November – National Care Givers Month

November is National Care Givers Month!

 We all know some one who is a caregiver, whether we find ourselves taking care of a loved one, know someone who takes care of a loved one, or even if we have heard an inspritational story on the news.

 In today’s busy world it can be easy to forget to show our appreciation to those who make a difference in our lives and the lives of others everyday. As we prepare to celebrate another Thanksgiving, let us give thanks to those who choose to spend their days serving others.

“Appreciation is the highest form of prayer, for it acknowledges the presence of good wherever you shine the light of your thankful thoughts.”
Alan Cohen

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